When I see a patient for the first time, I am not primarily concerned with theory or categorising that person. I am listening with my whole being to what they are saying, what they are not saying and what their body is saying to mine. It could be someone talking about being unable to conceive a baby, or someone trying to deny a deep grief and carry on as normal but their body is breaking down under the stress. It could be someone bursting with indignation and murderous rage, or a timidity or rigidity as a result of boarding school at a very young age. Separation and managing without parents was a prerequisite of colonial English history. The price children paid was enormous.