Relationships are a core component of human life. We are born into relationships and sustained by them. In them we find connection, support, meaning, and love. Relationships also have dark shadows. Cultural stories and societal expectations offer relationships as key to personal fulfillment. This leads us to seek wholeness through connection. We project our lacks onto others, burdening them with the task of meeting our needs. If left unconscious, we experience repetitive disillusionment in relationships and make destabilizing decisions, like affairs or impulsive changes.
In this course, Hollis offers the novel Madame Bovary as a reflection for seeking fulfillment outside of ourselves. Emma is limited by the culture of her time. Societal constraints on her gender leave her powerless to independently create the life she desires. As a result, she unconsciously projects what she lacks onto the world around her Her fantasies for wholeness are temporarily met then ultimately disillusioned in a marriage, an affair, religion, and suicide. Hollis shows how her search is universally shared. Disconnection from inner empowerment, nurturance, and fulfillment leads to projecting these qualities outside of ourselves. Being unconsciously wedded to these projections, we are bound to cyclical boredom, dissatisfaction and disappointment. However, by working through our relationship shadow we can experience deeply enriching relationships.